Lecture Response: Children, and Parents

In Rudolph Hall, five filmmakers gathered to speak about their projects. Each was the child of an architect who made a documentary about their parent—Yael Melamede with Ada: My Mother the Architect, Denise Zmekhol with Skin of Glass, Anita Naughton and Jim Venturi with Stardust. Nathaniel Kahn moderated. Sheepish, the conversation revolved around tenuous similarities between documentary filmmaking and architecture: both involve time, both centre people, both have a form…

They talked around the central relationship of their films: that of child and parent. Jim Venturi said about his parents’ work that, “each project had a secret to be found”—in effect, the same could be claimed for each documentary. They all began with a secret to uncover. Zmekol emphasized this, saying that she used the film to better understand her father after he moved away from their family home when she was fourteen.

Melamede countered. She, supposedly, didn’t yearn for clarity like the other filmmakers. In her movie, there is a striking exchange as she interviews her mother. Her mother asks her how she can love her so much. Yael laughs in response. Her mother continues: “What’s so funny? I wasn’t with you.” It conveys the clear distance that comes with the chosen career—the countless hours invested into projects, separating us from those we love. Yet, is recognizing the sacrifice enough to debunk the secret?

In the most poignant moment of the night, Melamede recounted an anecdote from filming My Architect with Kahn. As Nathaniel skated through the plaza of the Salk Institute, the wheels of his roller-skates left black traces of rubber behind him. Aren’t we all just trying to leave a trace on our parents, like they did on us?